3 Creative Ways to Cultivate Meaningful Connection
I asked Canadian scholar and author Henry Mintzberg to share the word of advice he most enjoyed giving managers. He said, “I can give you one word. Connect.”
I was underwhelmed. His wisdom came slowly to me. Ten years later, I strive to live into Mintzberg’s one-word.
A word about Mintzberg:
The way we write about management and the way management is practiced are two different things.
He writes, “Managers cannot be the reflective, systematic planners idealized in most management books—realities like the unrelenting pace, the frequent interruptions, and the dizzying variety of activity make that impossible.”
“We should be seeing managers as leaders, and leadership as management practiced well.”
Why cultivate meaningful connection:
Connecting feels inconvenient in a world of pressing deadlines. Just get ‘er did!
Who will deliver the best results? Someone who feels connected, or someone who feels like an outsider.
Energy, fulfillment, and results connect to relationship.
3 ways to cultivate meaningful connection:
Cultivate meaningful connection with heart and technique.
Heart makes you trustworthy. Technique makes you effective.
“Connection is the energy that exists between people when they feel seen, heard, and valued; when they can give and receive without judgement; and when they derive substance and strength from the relationship.” Brene’ Brown
Are you causing people to feel stronger because you’re in their life?
Brene’ Brown suggests three ways to cultivate meaningful connection in her new book, “Atlas of the Heart.”
#1. Develop grounded confidence displayed in a commitment to learn and improve.
#2. Practice courage to walk alongside. Be other focused. Share “power with” and “power to”.
#3. Practice story stewardship by honoring story as sacred. Build narrative trust by believing, acknowledging, and affirming.
I haven’t lived up to Mintzberg’s one-word, but I aspire to it.
How might managers cultivate meaningful connection in a world of pressing deadlines?
How might managers cultivate meaningful connection in a world of pressing deadlines?
Measure it. Establish a metric you will use to track/measure “meaningful connection” with your people.
Thanks for the suggestion, Paul. Person one way to track how we connect is to track our question asking.
How many questions to I ask about people? relationships? purpose? fulfillment?
Another metric might be how many things you remember about people a month later. That is, are you just asking the question or are you learning about the other person?
Brilliant! Thanks Jennifer.
Dan, may I differ with respect to your comment: “I haven’t lived up to Mintzberg’s one-word, but I aspire to it”. You constantly Connect – via this platform. The Leadership Freak is one of my all time favorites; offering layers and layers of meaningful content.
Your followers are connected because of you. Thank you!
Not sure I can agree with the “measurement” theory. Yet, measurement is essential. Too often it becomes a cold checkbox: “OK, this week I found out where Susan went to school, that she dislikes frogs and loves pizza – check – I have connected, now where is my improved productivity?”
So the challenge is how to measure, without checkboxing. If you intend to improve the connection levels in an organisation – tell people upfront about the initiative, and tell them why (now). Encourage spontaneity and ask how they suggest the initiative should be approached – Perhaps agree on how your Company wants to define the term. This is key as it will reflect their readiness-level. Your initiative is doomed, if you do not start where they are. Discuss (informally), what works and what does not and the progress made/ or not over time. At least then they will not wonder why you ask them strange and personal questions all of a sudden.
Connect happens when trust grows. Trust is utterly climate-sensitive.