The Recovering Engineer

MARCH 21, 2011

The DISC Model of Human Behavior is, as the name implies, about behavior. And, to apply it well, I suggest looking beyond behavior to the needs behind the behavior to really use it to connect and communicate with other people more effectively. To illustrate the point, consider the refrigerator shown above. While this one has no food in it, I imagine you can think of a time when you opened a refrigerator door to check the contents.

FAQ 243

FAQ Tips Stress Tools 243

The Recovering Engineer

JUNE 8, 2011

There are two musical instruments I would like to play. One is the saxophone and the other is the guitar. When I was in the fifth grade, my parents placed an order to rent a saxophone for the following school year so that I could join the band and learn to play. Over the summer, we moved to a different city where band started in fifth grade. I was out of sequence with the school system, and I wasn’t able to take private lessons.

Motivation 240

Motivation Tips Goal Learning-by-Doing 240

The Recovering Engineer

JANUARY 11, 2011

Subscribe to Receive Updates Home About This Blog Archives Great Reading Contact Me my business about me Communication Skills Persuasion DISC Model Family Relationships Parenting Leadership Skills Post Series Reflections Decision Making From Our Cats Personal Change Resolving Conflict Problem Solving Video Browse > Home / Leadership Skills / It Takes a Team It Takes a Team January 11, 2011 by Guy Harris Filed under Leadership Skills Leave a Comment Over the the last two months, I’ve travel

Team 239

Team Travel Engineering FAQ 239

The Recovering Engineer

MARCH 28, 2011

In a recent post, I presented a simple model for understanding what drives our behavior. According to the model, punishments (negative or unpleasant consequences) can reduce the likelihood that a behavior will repeat in the future. This observation implies that leaders can hope to eliminate “bad&# behaviors by using punishment and discipline strategies.

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Motivation Positioning Article Goal 236

The Recovering Engineer

FEBRUARY 13, 2011

What creates engagement? How do you build it, spread it , and maintain it? I don’t propose that I know the definitive answer to these questions. I do have an observation… People get engaged and enthusiastic about something they believe in. You’re probably thinking: “Really Guy. That’s all you’ve got?&# And my answer is, pretty much.

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Books Letter Video Proposal 230

The Recovering Engineer

NOVEMBER 21, 2011

Ignore these critical considerations when you write, and you could invite a communication disaster. Written messages just might be the most dangerous form of communication. There are so many ways that they can go wrong and lead to miscommunication. If you have ever written a message that someone else misunderstood, then you know what I mean. While, the general rules of effective communication apply equally to both spoken and written forms, there are some special factors to remember when you comm

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Letter Environment Tips Media 225

The Recovering Engineer

SEPTEMBER 21, 2011

I tend to notice how people respond to certain words. I guess that’s something of an “occupational hazard” for me. As I watch how people respond, I look for patterns. And I see a strong pattern developing around three words (and some variations) that almost certainly guarantee that a conflict will start or escalate if you use them carelessly.

Tips 224

Tips Politics Development Skills 224

The Recovering Engineer

MAY 7, 2011

Many leaders struggle with finding ways to motivate people to higher level performance. I have already written that you cannot motivate another person. So, let’s set aside the idea that the leader provides the motivation and move on to the idea that a leader can learn to identify the things that do motivate the people on his or her team. In previous posts, I wrote about Three Clues You Can Use to Find What Motivates Another Person and A Simple Model for Understanding What Drives Behavior.

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Motivation Tips Delegation Reference 218

The Recovering Engineer

AUGUST 27, 2011

A little over a week ago, my wife and I drove my daughter from Indiana to Texas to begin her freshman year of college. On the return trip, we drove through Oklahoma. As is common this time of year, we encountered road construction marked with a sign similar to the one above, and I felt frustrated as I thought about the coming delay. We then saw another sign with additional information.

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Construction Management Energy Information 217

The Recovering Engineer

FEBRUARY 3, 2011

Subscribe to Receive Updates Home About This Blog Archives Great Reading Contact Me my business about me Communication Skills Persuasion DISC Model Family Relationships Parenting Leadership Skills Post Series Reflections Decision Making From Our Cats Personal Change Resolving Conflict Problem Solving Video Browse > Home / Leadership Skills / From Bud to Boss: My Interview with LeaderLab From Bud to Boss: My Interview with LeaderLab February 3, 2011 by Guy Harris Filed under Leadership Skills Lea

FAQ 216

FAQ Engineering Emotional Intelligence Self-aware 216

The Recovering Engineer

JULY 13, 2011

A few weeks ago, I wrote a post in the ABC’s of Life series on forgiveness. Today, I got a comment from Aled Davies with a link to a post on his blog about 5 Steps to Forgiveness. I really liked what I read over at Aled’s blog, and it got me thinking: one of the key components I see in the 5 steps he wrote about is patience. The patience to: Slow down your emotional response.

Tips 210

Tips Power Blog Process 210

The Recovering Engineer

JUNE 15, 2011

A few months ago, I bought a guitar and started the process of learning to play. A few days ago, I wrote a post about what my motivation to purchase a guitar can teach leaders of all kinds. Today, I have another lesson drawn from my recent guitar playing endeavor for people of all ages and roles. First, the story behind the lesson. As my daughters and a friend of mine patiently teach me scales, chords, chord progressions, hand positions, and strumming patterns; I have learned to struggle through

FAQ 210

FAQ Hammer Learning-by-Doing Tips 210

The Recovering Engineer

OCTOBER 18, 2011

One of the common questions I get as I lead workshops and work with my coaching clients is: How do I decide it a conflict is worth the effort to resolve? I think this is a great question. Honestly, resolving a conflict can take lots of emotional energy. While I think it is generally a good idea to work with other people to productively resolve conflicts, I recognize that you do not need to invest this energy to resolve every conflict you might experience.

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Short-term Workshop Long-term How To 209

The Recovering Engineer

JULY 6, 2011

Have you ever seen or been involved in a conflict conversation where one person said: “I knew that you were going to say that!&#. If you have, you probably noticed that the conflict intensity escalated from that point forward. This type of statement is aggressive. It says that how you anticipate another person will react is a forgone conclusion rather than an expectation.

Tips 201

Tips Skills Positioning Influence 201

The Recovering Engineer

JUNE 2, 2011

In previous posts, I have written about a model for understanding what motivates behavior and three clues you can use to find what motivates another person. Today, I’ll share some quick insights about what motivates people based on their DISC behavioral style. A person who has outgoing and task-oriented (Dominant) traits is often motivated by: Solving problems.

Motivation 200

Motivation Tips Teamwork Stress 200

The Recovering Engineer

FEBRUARY 21, 2011

Last week, I had the opportunity to speak with Billy the Brain on KKZZ AM 1400 in Ventura, California. During this interview, we had the opportunity to discuss some key points from our new book: From Bud to Boss. We spoke about issues surrounding the transition to leadership, coaching skills, how to coach in an environment with an uncertain future, communication skills, collaboration concepts, and other ideas.

Skills 197

Skills Tips Environment Books 197

The Recovering Engineer

NOVEMBER 10, 2011

Before you start looking for the right communication technique or words to use to convey an idea, you must consider three critical factors. They are not complicated. They are important. Failure to include them in your thinking, could lead to a failed communication. Proper consideration of these three factors coupled with understanding the underlying principles of communication and conflict resolution will lead you to successful, powerful, and effective communications.

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Tools Workshop Tactics Strategy 194

The Recovering Engineer

FEBRUARY 20, 2011

In conflict situations, many of us struggle to maintain a fair and objective perspective about the other person. We assign all kinds of bad motives and intentions to their behaviors before we slow down long enough to really understand their perspective. This weekend I found a quote that offers a way to avoid this problem. Never ascribe to an opponent motives meaner than your own. – J.M.

Tips 188

Tips Objective Motivation Emotional Intelligence 188

The Recovering Engineer

FEBRUARY 2, 2011

Subscribe to Receive Updates Home About This Blog Archives Great Reading Contact Me my business about me Communication Skills Persuasion DISC Model Family Relationships Parenting Leadership Skills Post Series Reflections Decision Making From Our Cats Personal Change Resolving Conflict Problem Solving Video Browse > Home / Leadership Skills / My Interview With Mike Phillips on Lead the Team My Interview With Mike Phillips on Lead the Team February 2, 2011 by Guy Harris Filed under Leadership Skil

Team 186

Team Engineering FAQ Emotional Intelligence 186

The Recovering Engineer

JULY 8, 2011

I am not always “on my game.&# Teaching conflict resolution, problem solving, interaction dynamics, and leadership skills does not make me perfect at applying them. It does make me aware, and that awareness helps me to correct my thinking more quickly. It also makes me work on practicing the skills so that I keep getting better. And still, I have moments of insight about myself, my thinking, and my conflict approaches that are new.

Long-term 185

Long-term Information Skills Tips 185

The Recovering Engineer

OCTOBER 10, 2011

Today, as I sat in an airport business lounge waiting for a flight, I overheard bits and pieces of another traveler’s conversation. I wasn’t trying to overhear. I just couldn’t help but overhear because his volume kept getting progressively louder. From what I could tell, he was engaged in a bit of a conflict conversation. I could also tell that he was making a common mistake that rarely, if ever, leads to conflict resolution and almost always leads to conflict escalation.

Travel 182

Travel Tips Productivity Products 182

The Recovering Engineer

FEBRUARY 27, 2011

During the week between Christmas and New Year’s day, my wife and I went to the Biltmore Estate in Asheville, North Carolina. Near the end of the day, we stopped in one of the gift shops, and we found the plaque shown in the picture with this post. We immediately loved it, and I knew that it would become the object of a series of posts inspired by the message on it.

Morale 156

Morale Objective Power Article 156

The Recovering Engineer

JUNE 22, 2011

While forgiving often seems like something that you do for others, it is, in reality, something you do for yourself. Forgiving benefits the person who receives forgiveness, and it benefits the person who forgives even more. Many times, the person that has not received forgiveness has forgotten the event while the person who refuses to forgive continues to harbor anger and bitterness.

Article 153

Article Productivity Products 153

The Recovering Engineer

MAY 10, 2011

As I continue this post series inspired by The ABC’s of Life wall hanging pictured above, I am again struck by both the simplicity of the concept and the apparent difficulty many of us have with living out these powerful thoughts. Today’s thought is to express thanks. It’s not really that hard to do. Or is it? When we are tired, thinking about other things, or feeling awkward, we can overlook the idea of expressing thanks.

Maturity 144

Maturity Mentor Examples Cost 144

The Recovering Engineer

FEBRUARY 10, 2011

While I have posted some interviews and observations about what is happening with the the launch of my new book From Bud to Boss – Secrets to a Successful Transition to Remarkable Leadership (co-authored with my friend and colleague Kevin Eikenberry), I haven’t really given too many details. The lack of detailed information doesn’t mean we aren’t excited about the launch.

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Video Books Blog Resources 128

The Recovering Engineer

MARCH 24, 2011

Bad stuff happens to everyone. We all face illness, the death of loved ones, financial crises, job setbacks, relationship challenges, and mechanical malfunctions. All of them are real, and all of them can breed frustration. When faced with these events, we often view them only in the negative context, and we ask the question: “Why me?&#. Recently, I read a quote by the great tennis player Arthur Ashe : If I were to say, “God, why me?

Energy 119

Energy Proposal Crisis Learning-by-Doing 119

The Recovering Engineer

OCTOBER 5, 2011

As I write this post, I am sitting in a hotel in the suburbs of Chicago getting ready for an afternoon session with a client I have known for several years. I am also reflecting on the fact that today marks the twenty-seventh anniversary of my commissioning as an ensign in the United States Navy. Many things have happened in that twenty-seven years.

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Hotels Workshop Travel Consultative 114

The Recovering Engineer

APRIL 1, 2011

As I continue this post series inspired by a plaque I purchased while visiting the Biltmore House this past Christmas, I keep getting challenged by both the plaque and the process of writing about each word in succession. Today, I’m tackling a topic that does not come naturally to me. Actually, dreaming seems a bit flaky from my perspective. (Remember, I call myself The Recovering Engineer).

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Sports Travel Engineering Planning 114

The Recovering Engineer

MARCH 10, 2011

What a simple concept, and it is so often violated. It does not seem that being kind should be difficult. Yet, I see examples of unkindness all around me. Parents yelling at their kids. Kids ignoring their parents. Bosses interrupting employees. Employees gossiping about their boss. People cutting each other off in traffic. Customers getting impatient with store employees.

Stress 111

Stress Article Examples Skills 111

The Recovering Engineer

OCTOBER 20, 2011

Communication breakdowns are a common cause for conflict, and poor communication strategies can lead to rapid escalation. Likewise, effective communication strategies can help you correct these miscommunications to move conflicts quickly towards resolution. One idea that can help you choose the best communication strategy for the situation comes from what I call the communication continuum.

Guidelines 279

Guidelines Sharpe Strategy Tips 279

The Recovering Engineer

NOVEMBER 14, 2011

Have you ever taken an action – either immediately or at some later time – based on what you heard someone say only to find out after you acted (or spoke) that you did not accurately understand their statement or request? So far, everyone I have asked this question in a face-to-face conversation answers pretty much the same way. In effect, they all say: “Yes, of course I have.

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Shaw Course Positioning Development 259

The Recovering Engineer

MARCH 4, 2011

People frequently ask me why I use the DISC model in my work. Today, I’ll offer some of my reasons. I use the DISC model because: It is simple enough that… I can work with someone for only a few minutes and help them gain perspective they have never seen before. I can use it to help me when I am tired, stressed or angry. I don’t need assessment results to understand another person.

FAQ 230

FAQ Stress Objective Skills 230

The Recovering Engineer

JUNE 16, 2011

I’m sitting in an airline lounge at LAX, and I’m reflecting a bit on my week as I wait to board a red-eye flight back to Indianapolis. I just finished co-facilitating a single day training session with my friend and colleague Kevin Eikenberry that was part of a longer four-day training program. As we spoke with the participants, we heard about some of the other skills they were learning, and we encouraged them to look for ways to integrate what we were teaching with content from othe

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Airlines Learning-by-Doing Skills Training 188