Your Voice of Encouragement

FEBRUARY 25, 2015

Recently I was having a conversation about parenting with three people I love the most – my husband, daughter and son-in-law. This topic has immediate relevance for them since they had their first child in October. Some interesting questions popped up about Alison’s growing up years… What did Lee and I do to instill in her a sense of responsibility? How did we prevent her from developing a sense of entitlement as an only child?

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Your Voice of Encouragement

JULY 13, 2015

Do you have an ongoing conflict with someone in your professional or personal life? If the tension and differences have been going on for a while, you’ve probably made a substantial list of things about that person you’d like to change. Maybe it’s their attitude or their approach, or certain words and actions they use. If they would just start doing X or stop doing Y, then your life would be so much happier. What if there were something YOU could do that would dramatically improve the situation?

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Your Voice of Encouragement

NOVEMBER 5, 2014

I’d arrived a few minutes at the beauty salon for my hair appointment. While I was waiting for my stylist to arrive, I couldn’t help overhearing the only other stylist who was there with a client. Sheila” was talking non-stop about a worker’s compensation situation involving her brother. He had been seriously injured on the job a year ago and had not worked since.

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Your Voice of Encouragement

SEPTEMBER 17, 2014

“Mastering any kind of skill takes time, effort and patience. Along the way, there’s much you can do to help someone stay on track.” – Dennis E. Coates, Ph.D. in Support Coaching Do you know someone who’s trying to break a bad habit or form a new, positive one? Think back to when you’ve attempted to make such a change. It’s not easy. People will experience setbacks and failures as they work to adopt a new way that’s different from their familiar, comfortable pattern.

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Your Voice of Encouragement

OCTOBER 14, 2014

When you decide to make a change, you''ve taken an important step. Now you need to follow through on your commitment. But there’s a problem. As you begin this undertaking, you find that your old way of doing things kicks in more often than the new way. That’s because your brain is literally wired – it has physical connections – for the familiar pattern you’ve been using. It’s like putting on a pair of old, comfortable shoes.

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Your Voice of Encouragement

JANUARY 11, 2014

This year my primary care physician got promoted to an administrative position, so I needed to find a new doctor. I decided to go to a Doctor of Osteopathic Medicine (DO) due to what I’d read about their approach to treating patients: “DOs combine today''s medical technology with their ears to listen caringly to their patients, with their eyes to see their patients as whole persons, and with their hands to diagnose and treat patients for injury and illness.”

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Your Voice of Encouragement

NOVEMBER 11, 2013

I was trying to have a conversation with this person. But I found myself getting irritated with one thing he kept doing…interrupting me in the middle of a sentence and talking over me. It became impossible to carry on a conversation because it seemed like I was never able to articulate a complete thought. This is an extreme case, but unfortunately, interrupting is a common occurrence. We all do it at times.

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Your Voice of Encouragement

JUNE 11, 2014

I’ve been on a path of self-development for as long as I can remember…always on the look-out for books, podcasts, videos and quotes that inspire me to become more effective as a human being. The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz is a book that’s had a profound impact upon the way I view myself and everyone I encounter. It’s about adopting a code of conduct that results in a deeper sense of happiness and well-being.

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Your Voice of Encouragement

SEPTEMBER 21, 2015

Today I’m featuring a guest post from Henry Kimsey-House , co-author of a new, must-read book for every leader, Co-Active Leadership. A few years ago, Karen and I went to a workshop down in Silicon Valley called “Slideology” put on by Duarte Creative Design.

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Your Voice of Encouragement

JANUARY 27, 2014

On the first day of 2014, my husband and I had a terrific fall/winter garden in place, with rows of healthy vegetables like kale (3 varieties), collards and broccoli growing nicely. But then the bitterly cold weather hit a few weeks later, with temperatures in the single-digits. And all those lovely veggies got decimated overnight. I allowed myself a few minutes of feeling frustrated and disappointed.

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Your Voice of Encouragement

APRIL 2, 2015

When I got my first job as a supervisor, I was given no training on how to be an effective leader. I made a lot of mistakes. And I had absolutely no idea how to coach my direct reports on to improve their performance. Unfortunately, what I experienced is not uncommon. Companies often invest huge amounts of money and time training managers on the technical aspects of their job yet don’t make a similar investment teaching them how to lead and coach others. As I read Thomas G.

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Your Voice of Encouragement

APRIL 1, 2013

In our last office space, I had a private door to my office off the main hallway. I typically used that door for trips to the ladies’ room since it was closer than our main entrance. I left that door unlocked during those trips since I was only gone for a few minutes and didn’t want to have to carry my keys. One morning, as I entered the hallway, I encountered a tall, slender man in a black suit with a brightly colored shirt and tie.

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Your Voice of Encouragement

JUNE 17, 2013

When you observe truly outstanding performers in any field, it’s like looking at the tip of an iceberg. You can see only a tiny fraction of what lies beneath the surface. You aren''t able to watch the commitment, preparation and repetitions that preceded the performance. And you don’t have access to another element that plays a critical role in their success: mental rehearsal.

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Your Voice of Encouragement

MAY 21, 2013

Among the many useful insights I took away from Gavin de Becker’s masterful book The Gift of Fear , one of the most profound was a deeper appreciation for the distinction between worry and fear. Until reading the final chapter, I had not pondered the difference. But the author not only defines them clearly, he points out why one is harmful and the other can be life-saving. Gavin de Becker is one of the most sought-after, highly respected experts on security issues in the world.

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Your Voice of Encouragement

DECEMBER 31, 2014

A few years ago I got a phone call from a woman I’d connected with on Twitter. She had been following my blog and the blog of my business partner, Denny Coates , and said she was very impressed with our content. She said we were the kind of people she liked to connect with. Of course, I liked her immediately! She proceeded to ask lots of questions about our focus and business, expressing genuine interest along the way.

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Your Voice of Encouragement

OCTOBER 29, 2013

Sometimes you discover information that’s so important, you want to scream it from the rooftops to make sure everyone else finds out about it, too. That’s what I felt like doing after reading David Perlmutter’s eye-opening book, Grain Brain: The Surprising Truth about Wheat, Carbs, and Sugar – Your Brain’s Silent Killer s. Because what’s contained in these pages is not common knowledge. Very few people know which nutrients best feed our brains and ensure long-term mental health.

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Your Voice of Encouragement

DECEMBER 3, 2013

Several years ago I was supervising a team of ten people, and most of them got along well. But over time, I picked up serious rumblings from four of them about “Rita,” one of the team members. They had legitimate complaints about her performance related to lack of cooperation and sharing of information. They found her difficult to approach and talk to.

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Your Voice of Encouragement

MARCH 24, 2014

As I was reading Sheryl Sandberg ’s thought-provoking book, Lean In: Women, Work, and the Will to Lead , I encountered a passage that popped out at me. As the sub-title implies, Sandberg addresses this book to women. But it’s an excellent read for men as well. She peels back the curtain on what goes on in women’s heads and in organizations to prevent women from advancing their careers and taking on more leadership positions.

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Your Voice of Encouragement

FEBRUARY 4, 2013

We miss many opportunities to have meaningful dialogue with another person, and as a result, we lose out on deepening the relationship. What often happens instead is that people assert their opinions without considering the reasoning, assumptions, or facts that their opinions are based on. They feel distressed or angry when someone expresses an opposing point of view. They argue. The interchange becomes heated and emotional. It becomes a matter of winning and losing.

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Your Voice of Encouragement

JUNE 25, 2013

My husband Lee and I were in the kitchen preparing dinner last week, and I said, “I’m thinking that broccoli would be great as a side dish.” He looked at me and chuckled. What are you laughing about?” “It’s It’s just that you''ve been starting a lot of sentences lately with ‘I’m thinking…’ and I bet you don’t even realize you’re doing it.” I had no clue. I was completely unaware that I was even saying those words. Until he pointed it out to me. Does it bother you?” I asked.

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Your Voice of Encouragement

APRIL 28, 2014

“Change the way you look at things, and the things you look at change.” – Wayne Dyer, American author (1940- ) My husband Lee was a residential builder for almost 30 years. By training, he’s a mechanical engineer. That means he likes to take things apart and put them back to together. He loves figuring out what makes them work. He also pays attention to detail and notices the little things. I, on the other hand, tend to focus on ideas and people.

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Your Voice of Encouragement

JANUARY 7, 2013

Back in 1994 I completed the self-assessment in Martin Seligman ’s now-classic book, Learned Optimism. With most quizzes, I answer the questions, think about the interpretation for a few minutes and promptly forget about it. Not this time. The insights I gained from that thought-provoking test had a profound, lasting effect on the way I think about and explain what happens to me in life.

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Your Voice of Encouragement

MAY 24, 2013

Recently I was reminded once again how hard it is to change the way we think and the way we act, specifically when it comes to giving up a bad habit and adopting a good one. My husband Lee and I were at the Outer Banks of North Carolina with a group of enthusiastic bird watchers, and one morning we were having breakfast with another couple. The topic of food came up. The husband said he had a history of heart disease in his family and revealed that he’s pre-diabetic.

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Your Voice of Encouragement

NOVEMBER 18, 2015

Even though it’s been more than 40 years ago, I can still clearly remember the day my parents dropped me off to start my college career. I had no idea what to expect. They had brought all six of us kids up with a strong moral compass, but I know I wasn’t prepared for all the challenges and choices I’d face in that first year and throughout my college life. I had to feel my way through the process, and I made a lot of mistakes along the way. A lot.

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Your Voice of Encouragement

AUGUST 8, 2014

I''ve been in business since 1982 and have read dozens of books about networking over the years. Usually Id get a nugget here and there, but then I was left to cobble together my own plan. In her Network Like a Fox is refreshingly different. Inside the covers of this value-packed book by Nancy Fox is an entire strategy mapped out for the taking. Foxs recommended approaches are closely aligned with my own values, focusing on what you can do for other people and not what theyll do for you.

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Your Voice of Encouragement

APRIL 8, 2013

My company had just completed a survey of our customers using our 20/20 Insight software, asking them to give us feedback about our product and our technical support staff. I was studying the results to identify areas we could improve the program and our service. These two comments grabbed my attention. “I I hesitate to call because I don’t like the way Sue talks to me.” "I I avoid calling unless I’m desperate for help. Sue uses a condescending tone whenever I call.”

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Your Voice of Encouragement

JULY 19, 2013

It’s been more than 30 years since Dustin Hoffman played the starring role in the movie Tootsie. This now-classic film required him to dress up as a woman in order to play the character of Dorothy Michaels. But before he agreed to play the part, he had a requirement. He didn’t want to look like a man dressed in drag. He wanted to be seen as a woman when walking down the streets of New York City. That, he was able to do.

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Your Voice of Encouragement

JANUARY 21, 2013

When people set New Year’s resolutions, many include a weight loss goal. My husband and I took a different twist on this since he doesn't have additional pounds to lose and I have just a few. We want to eat in such a way that we maintain our ideal weight and keep our bodies in great working order so we stay healthy and avoid taking medications as we get older.

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Your Voice of Encouragement

MARCH 18, 2014

Imagine this. You have an idea for a book that you believe would be fantastic. You draft a proposal and send it to five publishers as a test. They all say no. You try five more. They say no, too. You’re discouraged but decide to double up and send your idea to TEN more publishers. Still no takers. That’s 20 indicators that your idea has no merit. What would you do at this point? Most people would give up. Maybe their idea wasn’t so great after all. Or it’s not worth the effort to keep trying.

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Your Voice of Encouragement

JUNE 17, 2014

Alex Tremble, author of The GPS Guide to Success I am drawn to people who have an exciting vision and take bold action. I’m especially impressed with individuals who develop these behavior patterns at a young age. Alex Tremble is such a person, and I’m privileged to know him. We met on Twitter after he gave me positive feedback about one of my blog posts. Our 140-character exchanges led to phone conversations where I learned about his deep commitment to helping young people.

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Your Voice of Encouragement

NOVEMBER 19, 2012

“Gratitude is the most exquisite form of courtesy.” - Jacques Maritain, French philosopher (1882-1973) This time of year we’re encouraged to think about the people and things in our lives that we’re thankful for. Actually, this is a good thing to do every day. Starting and ending your day with a sense of gratitude helps you keep your difficulties in perspective. Making a list of what you’re grateful for is even more powerful. And I’d like to recommend another step: Expression of that gratitude.

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Your Voice of Encouragement

DECEMBER 28, 2012

For some reason, many of us wait until January 1 each year to set new goals. As if that’s the only time it’s appropriate to describe what you want to do, have or be. Actually, any day can work. But no matter when you decide the time is right, these five ingredients are essential for those dreams to become a reality. And they apply whether your goals focus on physical health, finances, relationships, career or spirituality.

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Your Voice of Encouragement

SEPTEMBER 7, 2014

The principles in Napoleon Hill’s classic, Think and Grow Rich can certainly be applied to the accumulation of money. But they also represent an outstanding roadmap for accomplishing any worthwhile achievements in your life. Best-selling author Bob Proctor has studied and taught Hill’s 13 success principles for 40 years. The two habits he’s developed over the years are worth adopting: 1. Read a few lines from the book every day.

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Your Voice of Encouragement

OCTOBER 15, 2012

In the first job where I supervised other people, I made a terrible mistake. One day, a woman on my team told me she had done something without asking me, something she thought I’d be happy about. As I listened to her describe what she did, I let my facial expression communicate that I wasn’t pleased about the action she’d taken. I don’t think I actually scowled, but I probably came pretty close.

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Your Voice of Encouragement

AUGUST 4, 2013

Several years ago I went on a “ladies only” weekend with six friends to a cabin that one of them owned in the mountains. We got along well and had a lot of fun together. But I noticed one very interesting thing over the course of the 3 days. A few of us consistently pitched in to help clean up the dishes after a meal, while others were content to sit around and watch. I found it curious that the thought never seemed to cross their minds about making a contribution or doing their fair share.

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