How to Overcome the Danger of Over Commitment
I have the ability to improve something until it stops working.
I reconnected with journaling last November. But I did it differently and it worked. I committed to record ONE point of gratitude on a notepad for 30 days. No fancy journals and no long-term commitments. Just a free notepad from our insurance company and a pen.
The danger of addition:
I’m still journaling. But I’m dangerously close to turning joyful simplicity into over commitment.
Sometimes the secret to success is subtraction, but most prefer addition.
My gratitude journal began simply. Somehow I fell into the trap that ambushes leaders I work with – adding improvements until joy becomes burden.
This morning I recorded one point of gratitude. I should have stopped there, but I’m a high achiever!
After a point of gratitude. I recorded an intention for the day. But there’s more.
I also recorded a positive memory. Then I chose to send an encouraging email to someone. And by the way, I also added a short journaling practice at the end of the day. I can’t leave good enough alone.
Some mornings I explore why I’m thankful.
The joy of subtraction:
I’m going back to one simple commitment: record one point of gratitude every morning. Optional activities might include:
- Reflect on a positive memory.
- Reflect on the reason for my gratitude. (Purpose)
- Set an intention for the day.
Questions restore control:
After recording a single point of gratitude, I’ll ask myself some questions.
- Would you like to spend time reflecting on a positive memory?
- Would you like to reflect on the reason you’re thankful?
- Would you like to set an intention for the day?
Some mornings I’ll journal a few lines. Other mornings I’ll journal a few pages. It’s my choice.
One commitment with several options protects me from over commitment and enables me to control the practice instead of the practice controlling me.
What dangers might be present in over-improvement?
How might leaders be content without being complacent?
Bonus material:
Avoiding overcommitment (apa.org)
Are You Overcommitted? | Psychology Today
This is spot on! I find myself doing this as well in many different facets of life. Maybe it’s the sports background where over-achieving and doing more is heavily praised. Or maybe it’s subconsciously an effort to prove self-worth? One thing I have discovered about myself is when I do that, I tend to make the attempt too complex and rendering it unsustainable. Progress in anything demands consistency. To piggy back off what you have said, less is often times more.
Great post, Dan! Thank you.
Thanks Josh. It’s interesting that we add things to the point of failure. Sounds self-defeating.
Via Negativa, funny this has been coming up more and more lately. A great podcast on productivity I listen walked through the aspects of this just last week and I have started to challenge people at work on whether we really need to keep adding stuff. Sometimes its better to take away the added administrative burdens and get back to the basics or fundamentals as we call them. Then you knock the fundamentals out of the park and generally the rest falls into line. I am notorious myself of taking on more and more, whether it’s my own journal or how I track things, just because I can doesn’t mean I should. It is a constant battle to double check what I want to add to my daily run stream. Thanks for reinforcing this.
Thanks James. “Just because you can doesn’t mean you should.” Sometimes it means you shouldn’t. 🙂
So true, Dan. Too much “good” can become the enemy of the best!
I’m a product of over-commitment. As I’m on an adventure of discovering my inner workings, I find that as an Enneagram Type 2, over-commitment is my kryptonite. I’m realizing that I have resented things (and people) because I felt “obligated” to do it. If I didn’t, what would people think of me? How would I be perceived? Plus, I love to improve things and feel that I can do it. As my adventure continues, I’ve realized that just because I can, doesn’t mean I should. It’s when I’m in my quiet time that I read and reflect. In one book called The Best Yes by Lisa TerKeurst, I’m learning to cure the disease to please with the knowledge to love the escape of guilt in disappointing others. Only say Yes to the best yes, which includes A LOT of no’s.
Thank you. Refreshing and freeing.
Thanks John.
“Mission creep” is another way of describing what happens when we violate the agreements with ourselves. That’s why it’s important for me to have clarity on the intention behind any activity. In the Jewish faith, it’s called finding the “kavanah” or the internal spirit of the activity that wants to emerge if only we let it. Every journal entry has its own kavanah.
Thanks Jkador. Yes, I hadn’t thought of ‘mission creep’ but it definitely applies. While we’re doing X, why don’t we just do Y as well? No! … why don’t we finish X?
I’ve stopped “over committing” and I find myself more content. When I commit to a task or challenge (not problem) I lay out the particulars, who what, why and when and then I go about tackling said challenge. I overcommunicate on the task and organize all tasks in a simple manner as needed. I find opportunities to insert “margin” into said tasks (i.e I believe I can complete by Friday (when it is Monday)) and then seek to complete early. If for any reason I can’t complete by Friday (and it is always input from others) I adjust with all stakeholders the end expected date. I find I am more efficient and can manage my challenges better in this manner. Should anyone ask I have the details to back up the time line and expected completion. More importantly I find I am not as rushed or frustrated or tired when I approach the world this way.
Dan,
Wonderful discussion today, I like Roger’s viewpoints, similar to how I try to schedule or plan, then we have the uncontrolled factors of “I don’t know what we want? I need it tomorrow! Tends to interfere, yet we still get it done, most of the time.
Tim; One other thing I do is try to focus others on “emergencies”. If everything is an emergency than nothing is. When I do this they stop and look at what they are asking or working with. Everything is not an emergency.
Thanks for this blog entry today! I am hopelessly a three on the enneagram and I find myself plagued by the burden of being driven to overachieve. The suggestion of making one commitment and giving myself options to protect myself from over commitment as a way to control the practice rather than allowing the practice to control me is solid gold. It is a simple suggestion that has broad application.
It reminds me of a quote in Steve Saccone’s book Protege, “Too often we as Christ followers talk about what to run away from rather what to run toward. It’s not enough to reject foolishness. We must pursue wisdom … relentlessly.” Your blog gave solid wisdom on how to avoid overcommitment. Something that stands between so many of us and good success.
I have visited your blog from time to time. I plan on making it a regular stop in the future.
Dan – this is great insight into the drive of many a good leaders. You have the gift of wisdom and communication. Thanks for who you are and what you do.
I have been journaling as well, and while I’m doing it at the end of the day I am focusing on 3 good things that happened during the day or that I was able to accomplish. This is a mix of personal and professional items, but it is reassuring when I have had a rough day to see all of the positive things that I have accomplished in previous days.
I hope things are going well, Dan.
Hey Steve. So great to see you. I have a natural inclination to notice bad stuff. The journaling practice, as you indicate, is a good opportunity to get a grip on my mindset. I wish you well. Things are snowy here in PA.