7 Ways Young Leaders Succeed with Elders
It’s growing more common for young people to lead teams that include elders.
Some elders look down on their youngers.
Entitlement:
Entitlement expects respect or opportunity without earning it. Elders may expect respect simply because they’ve been at it longer. Younger may expect opportunity or position simply because they want it.
Both elders and youngers may feel the other doesn’t get it.
Greater challenge:
The greater challenge of working on inter-generational teams lies with the younger. In order to thrive, young leaders must navigate elders who have more experience, power, resources, and prestige.
7 ways young leaders succeed with elders:
#1. Show respect, even if you don’t feel respected. It’s self-defeating to expect respect before extending it.
- Honor knowledge, even if you feel smarter. Ask questions. Stay curious.
- Honor experience, even if you feel it’s no big deal. Invite and listen to stories.
- Honor position, even if hierarchy irritates you. Learn how they earned their position.
Connection with elders is forged with respect.
Showing respect is about a humble heart. When you feel misunderstood, remember to understand others.
#2. Adopt a learner’s attitude. Older leaders often feel superior because they believe they’re more knowledgeable. You may know more than your elders, but you haven’t experienced more.
Elders feel disrespected when youngers offhandedly reject suggestions.
#3. Build a team of elder-advisors. Make it public that you’re listening to mentors. Publicly talk about things you’re learning from elders.
#4. Try on suggestions that rub you the wrong way. I’ve found that wisdom often seems wrong when I’m unenlightened. I’m still rejecting ideas that make sense later.
#5. Find an elder-advocate who believes and supports you. Some elders value the perspective and talent of young leaders.
#6. Focus on adding value more than receiving it. How might you help elders achieve their goals?
#7. Work hard.
How might younger leaders succeed with elders?
I connect strongly with this post because it reflects the way I tried to approach my 40+year career in law enforcement. My family raised me to respect my elders and to listen to them in order to learn. Being college educated I was among a minority of officers as I began my career, nevertheless I had been taught that there is a difference between knowing about how to do something (“book learning,” if you will) and knowing how to do it in practice. I determined to make myself a sponge for what my “elder” officers could teach me from their experience as well as their knowledge. As and when appropriate, applying my own knowledge and experience as they grew, I began to develop my own methods and ways of approaching the work, based on the “best practices” I saw and was taught. As I worked and learned over the years, I realized my role was gradually changing as I was no longer one of the “new guys;” I had actually become a trusted peer and person of some influence. Respect had been given and was returned. When opportunities to expand my knowledge and experience were available, I embraced them. I went back to school to earn an advanced degree. When leadership opportunities presented themselves, I tried to take full advantage of them and justify the trust that was placed in me. This also involved a new round of mentoring in leadership.I became a trainer (I still am.) and endeavored to learn and teach best practices and tactics to help officers survive and thrive on the job and in life. When I realized that I was looked at as an “elder,” I was determined to be a reliable resource for the younger officers in my organization. In honor of those who mentored me, I strove to be a good mentor to others. A large part of my last few years on the job were spent in leadership development and succession planning for the organization. I retired feeling confident that I had made a difference to at least a few people over the years. My successful career was a credit not to me, but to all those who taught, mentored, set a good example, believed in me and provided opportunities to me over the years. I will be forever grateful to them all. “Before people care how much you know, they have to know how much you care.” That applies whether you are an elder or a newbie. Thanks for this post, it brings back a lot of good memories of a long career.
Dan, Really a good article for people like me who is working with both new joiners and Elders. It will definitely help me to advance my career. Thank you!
Hi Dan,
Adding another one here 🙂
#8. Be very transparent about your flaws and vulnerabilities. A “defect-free” brand creates hesitation among any generation. Humbling yourself in front of your elder colleagues drives respect.
Thanks!
Cheers,
Marcio
Thanks for the post, Dan! I’m part of the millennial generation, and I think it’s so important to give credit where it’s due. When we (and those younger than I) come out of school with our shiny new degrees, it’s easy to overestimate our abilities and how they’ll transfer in the workplace. Nothing can replace years of hard work and learning within an industry. The more we listen to each other, the better off we’ll all be.
Thanks for the post,! Its such a really nice post.I am agree with your 7 point work hard. Show respect, even if you don’t feel respected.such a really nice thought.
While this is worthwhile advice, I believe it’s important to note it’s no guarantee to successfully managing an elder. When push comes to shove you may need to enter a “fight” to shake things up. Coming out on the other end it is important to show the values above again to the elder in question to mend the relationship. If it still doesn’t work after that, I’m afraid the elder may jeopardize your leadership position.
How to handle that situation depends on your specific situation and your authority within the company. Something everybody involved needs to understand, both manager and subordinate, is that when continued disturbance of a team member outweighs their usefulness, drastic measures are the only way. This applies to every working relationship regardless whether the leadership is younger or older.
I’ve experienced the problem as significantly more complicated than the rules described above, but they are a good basis and most elders I have experienced have, and continue to respond well to this.
And for all those young leaders, remember it may not be easy for elders to accept young leaders. After all, remember there may be a sense of entitlement to the role someone younger just got. So being humble about your appointment goes a long way.
If it were to happen to me, I don’t know how I would take this.
Working as an advisor for young engineers : I am a Civil engineer ,having more than thirty years of experience,I was a QA/QC Coordinator at our company head office, a few years have passed and I got transferred, recently, to a company site where I joined Civil maintenance section where I have been treated with respect by all of the young engineers and I have been politely requested by them, friendly but not officially, to be working with them as an adviser , passing on my knowledge and past work experience to them, gradually, and I was more than happy to accept their respect.This new job is really interesting and I have exerting all my efforts to teach them all I know , and I have also doing more reading to expand our knowledge as a group. I have two more years to retire and I just hope things stay the same.
I believe everyone wants respect on the job: elders for their experience and hard-won knowledge, juniors for their new ideas. Personally, I love to work with a variety of age groups and especially enjoy bringing up new talent. We learn from each other. The transfer of knowledge is amazing on a team that is open minded and has a can-do, eager to learn-together mindset.