How to Seize the Biggest Missed Opportunity in Meetings
The higher you go in an organization, the more time you spend in meetings. Meetings are untapped opportunities to build culture.
Live your values in meetings.
Treat people – in the conference room – the way you want them to treat each other in the hall. The way we treat each other, while we do the work, is the most important thing about us.
Relationship:
Suppose you value relationships. What happens in your meetings that would convince an outsider you value relationships?
Empowerment:
Suppose you value empowerment. Lead meetings that make others feel powerful.
Empowerment is giving power not taking it.
Power of empowerment:
Most of the articles about power I read are about gaining it, not giving it. Frustration, disengagement, and helplessness go up when power goes down.
Boldness and results rely on feeling powerful.
Walk into your next meeting asking yourself, “How will I make others feel powerful?”
Power agenda items:
- What behaviors/practices produced success?
- What behaviors/practices should we stop?
- What behaviors/practices make us better?
- How will we know we’re improving?
- How will we honor success?
The power shift:
Begin with “we” – move to “I”.
People tend to talk about themselves when things go well and others when things go wrong. Shift from “we/us” to “you” in the list above, . For example.
“What behaviors make us better,” becomes, “What behaviors will make you better?” Listen for responses that begin with “I”.
Weakness hides behind “we”.
Meetings that make people feel powerful begin with “we”, but always include “I/me”.
Culture building:
Lead meetings in ways that align with organizational values and priorities. Suppose you value engagement, how will you engage the people around the table?
Meetings are culture building opportunities for leaders who spend most of their time in meetings.
How might meetings be used as culture building opportunities?
Dan that WE point is so true. 15 years removed from office meetings but I see the same deal online. It is OK to be inclusive but that one to one chat makes things intimate in office settings. I do the same thing on my blog. You and I want to feel special, exclusive and singular. Awesome post dude.
Ryan
Thanks Ryan. It’s great to read your affirmation of this important idea. Just to springboard, when I work with coaches the shift from using “we” to “you” is an important shift.
Don’t say “we” when you mean “you.”
Dan, I love your comment about moving from we to I. I work with many leaders that want to use “we” with their teams to ensure the team feels part of the process and not to single themselves out as a leader who is “above” or apart from the team. Sometimes they mean “we” sometimes they mean “you”. Even when it really is a collective “we”, the team is looking for vulnerability from their leader and to hear the leader’s perspective. I think those are the times that its important to start with we and then move to I. I like how you’ve frame that there is room for both – Thanks!
Dan at one of my old firms, USG Corp., every business group and even the Board meetings started with a review of Safety performance. USG started as a mining firm but safety was a true Core Value. When USG acquired my old private firm it was a valuable practice we picked up as well.the company also celebrated safety milestones with dinners at the plants with spouses and so of us senior executives present as well.
Brad
The resonant pith to me, here, is: “The way we treat each other, while we do the work, is the most important thing about us.” It’s the essence of life, love, parenting, caring for elders, all of the strong, salient points of life. I plan to use that quote.
Hi Dan, love your blog, thanks.
I guess the we to I switch is really important, only after you find out at what level the person is at. Or stage. As you know there are 5 stages of leadership or culture, and most people are at stage 2 or 3, and at that level the ‘I’ word is certainly important.
When you’re in a higher level of organisation, at stage 4+ the individuals all have a different kind of responsibility I feel than those at the lower levels. So the language there comes across differently.
Thanks for your blogpost!
Anita Vroonland
http://www.TribalRainmakersClub.com