“Listening is something I’ve been doing essentially all my life.  I learned to do it because that was the only way I could learn.  I remember what people say.  I remember words they use…”
So he would sit in class at law school… focusing on what was said and committing what he heard to memory.  His memory by that point was a formidable instrument.
Quote from, and observation about, renowned attorney David Boies, who has dyslexia — in Malcolm Gladwell’s David and Goliath

What is a conversation?
The first person speaks, and the second person listens.  Then the second person speaks, and the first person listens. 
This is called turn-taking.
Source unknown

My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry.
James 1:19

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How many times does one person misunderstand another person?  Or, do the wrong thing, or not get something done, because they did not listen to the instructions well?

I could list a full bushel basket full of books that talk about the importance of listening.  Leaders especially have to learn to listen – but, so does everyone else.

But, after all the years of writings and admonitions and research and cajoling, many people still do not listen very well.  So, here is your Listening 101 lesson of the day.

To listen is to – pay full attention to what the other person is communicating, either in spoken form, or-non-verbal form, or written form…

This probably requires putting everything down, such as iPhones, and iPads, and maybe even paper and pen (though, taking notes can be an aid to good listening) – and then focusing your eyeballs, and your full attention to the person doing the communicating.

And, only when you have “heard” the message, fully “attended to” the message, given your full attention to the message, have you listened.

Let me put it a little more simply.  To listen well:

Keep your mouth shut, and your eyeballs looking at the one speaking. 
Do not open your mouth until the other person has finished his/her thought completely. 
Then, and only then, repeat back what you have heard, to make sure you comprehended the message. 
Shut your mouth – listen – feedback.  This is Listening 101.

Here are four listening tricks from 4 Unusual Listening Tricks for Lawyers by Mike Moore, from the web site Legal Productivity.  These are valuable “tricks” indeed.  Mr. Moore states “One key aspect of good communication is attentive, focused listening,” and then shares his four “tricks”:

1. Stay quiet. Basic, but essential. Let the other person (your client, your partner, your paralegal) finish their point without interruption.
2. Refrain from “thinking ahead” while someone is speaking to you. By focusing solely on exactly what the speaker is saying, to the exclusion of everything else, you will be less likely to miss anything – including important nuances or implications.
3. Wait for the speaker to explicitly note they’re finished making their point, or ask if they’re finished.  Be certain that the speaker is finished making their point, and they’re happy with the way they’ve made it, before you start responding.
4. Explain the speaker’s point back to the speaker. One of the best ways to measure whether you really know something or not is whether you can comfortably teach it to someone else…  In addition to confirming understanding, there’s often a bonus to this step: from the speaker’s perspective, there can be a little boost of perceived respect.

These are excellent tricks.  And I’ve just given a short portion of his more full explanation of the four tricks.  Click over to the article and read it in full.  It is valuable.

So, here is your suggested challenge for this week.  For the rest of this week, work on/practice your listening skills in at least one conversation per day.

And then, repeat often enough that over time you actually become good at this listening task that is so very important.