Leadership isn’t Disney Land
We live in an imperfect world. The universe isn’t conspiring to do anything.
Leadership is more like a war zone than Disney Land. Yes, it’s fulfilling. Yes, there are rewards. And yes, you get to make a difference.
Leadership isn’t Disney Land. Success is enjoying the battle.
Leadership isn’t Disney Land:
- You can’t fix everything. Shift from fixing to enabling others to fix.
- When you feel certain, you’re missing something.
- Turbulence is normal. You work toward stability, but if the seas are calm now, they won’t be for long.
- Where people interact, friction pops up.
- Change makes things worse before it makes them better.
- New people usually make friction worse.
- Complaints are like weeds. You pull them today – they return tomorrow.
- You have inadequate information. It’s foggy most of the time.
- Some people are jerks. It doesn’t matter what you do.
- Focus is rare – distraction normal.
How to enjoy living in a war zone:
#1. Remember why:
Nietzsche said, “He who has a why to live for can bear almost any how.”
Constant battles cause you to forget the reason for the war.
Why are you leading in the first place?
#2. Learn:
Be a learner, not a knower. Ask questions.
- What do you think we should do?
- What’s important?
- What are we learning?
- Why does it matter? Or what’s important about this?
- What does the win look like? It’s shocking how many people work in frustration without an idea of what a win looks like.
#3. Expect people to do their job:
Kind leaders tend to assign work to themselves. You’re a failure when you regularly do someone’s job for them.
War zones are intolerable when you consistently do other people’s work for them.
What’s on your list of discomforting realities about leadership?
How can people enjoy the battles in leading?
Still curious:
5 Ways to Exploit the Circle of Life
Humility and self-reflection strengthen leaders for the battle. Click here to check out, The Vagrant: The Inner Journey of Leadership. It’s a wonderful tool for leaders facing challenges.
I quit Disney years ago.
Is now a horrid company!
Of course!
OK Dan… this is crazy!!! Crazy Good! Loved it brother. Happy Bird-Day to you and your family.
Thanks man. BTW “communivations” is fascinating.
Best one to date since I have joined up to receive the daily messages. Thank you and have a great and safe Thanksgiving.
Thank you for signing up, Patrick. Happy Thanksgiving to you.
What’s on my list of discomforting things about leadership?
I am getting ready to do my first ever performance reviews with my team. This is my first year in a people leader role, and I am nervous about providing constructive criticism to my team. I don’t want to sound mean. I’ve had mean bosses, I’ve had bosses who provided feedback that made me realize they had no idea what I did on a daily basis. I don’t want to be that person.
I want them to excel, and I have really high expectations of myself, but is it right to extend that same level of expectation to them?
You should always have high expectations, as long as you clearly express them AND tailor them for each person. You want to avoid having one set of expectations for everyone, regardless of their knowledge, skills, and abilities.
For example, an assignment that an experienced person can complete in day may take a newer person a week. Tell them both what you want done and by when. On Monday afternoon, you tell the experienced person you want it by lunch on Tuesday while you tell the newer person you want it by close of business on Friday.
And remember: it can go the other way. The newer person may be able to complete an assignment faster than an experienced person. Take, for example, data analysis. If the newer person is a whiz at pivot tables in Excel, they may knock something out in a couple of hours that someone who isn’t as familiar with pivot tables is going to take a couple of days to do.
So glad you jumped in on this, Jennifer.
Hey SB, Congratulations on getting to this level of influence and responsibility. Your question reminds me of what Doug Conant, former CEO of Campbell’s Soup, says, “Be tough on standards and tender with people.”
The opportunity you face falls into a tension between challenge and support. Some leaders lean heavy on challenge and neglect support. Others lean heavy on support and neglect challenge. You can imagine the downside of each approach.
You might simply ask each person a couple questions.
We perform best when we feel acceptable levels of challenge. How can I best challenge you?
I want to support you in ways that help you reach your potential. What does support look like to you? (Listen for behaviors.)
Best wishes
What’s on your list of discomforting realities about leadership?
Leaders have to have HARD conversations (Honest, Appropriate, Respectful, Direct)
How can people enjoy the battles in leading?
People appreciate HARD conversations – when all 4 parts are included. They are not easy, but it can take months of “normal” coaching and conversations to experience the same appreciation for being honest and up-front with people in 1 difficult conversation.
Thanks, Ryan. I love a good acronym!
We have so few leaders anymore – no leaders for country, community, or self – it seems. Understanding that things that are hard are worth the effort seems to also be a missed message. Good stuff, Dan. Thank you for still being out here with your fantastic tidbits of wisdom!
Thanks for the good word, DJ. Best wishes.
How can people enjoy the battles in leading?
we can role model the behavior we expect from others.
Thanks, CV. Modeling the way is the great challenge of leadership.