How Our Family Affects The Kind Of Leaders We Like

Since being married to a childhood health expert, I’ve gained a fresh perspective on the key role our upbringing plays in all aspects of our adult life, so the findings of new research from San Francisco State University should perhaps come as no surprise.  It reveals that our childhood family environment plays a big role in our support for various leadership styles as adults.

“We see it all the time — where the obnoxious leader rises to the top, but we don’t know much about why,” the researchers say. “Tyrants, whether they be in the boardroom or in politics, wouldn’t have the power they do if followers didn’t support them. We often look to leaders to explain leadership, but we should also be looking to followers.”

The researchers used data from the Fullerton Longitudinal Study, which has been tracking families since 1979.  The data revealed a strong correlation between adolescents who revealed high levels of conflict at home, and those who subsequently identified undesirable traits in their ideal leaders.

Family dynamics

The survey asked participants about the dynamics of their family, including whether people were physically violent, often criticizing one another, or raising their voices.  Those same participants were then asked to rate various leadership traits on a scale of desirability, with each of the 10 traits presented to them defined by the researchers as tyrannical.  These traits included pushiness, dominance, manipulation, and selfishness.

“It’s critical that we asked about ideal leadership and not just leadership in general,” the researchers say. “Because we really wanted to get at a person’s favored leadership image, the characteristics they ideally want to see in their leaders.”

The two results were compared to see if a connection exists between conflict in the home and the leadership traits we most desire at work.  The data revealed that people who grew up in a conflict-ridden household were 20% more likely to prefer a tyrannical leadership style at work.  The researchers believe this is because households with high levels of conflict likely contain a lot of tyrannical leadership characteristics, which then leave a lasting impression on those who live through it.

The researchers suggest that their findings shed new light on why many of us can look for leaders who are, on the surface, wholly inappropriate.  It might also explain why some tyrannical bosses think that such behaviors are appropriate, as they act out traits they themselves experienced at home.

“The first step is getting them to question their assumptions about why they do what they do,” the researchers explain. “Maybe they’ll realize that they believe this, because that’s how their dad behaved and he was successful in business. And so they believe that’s how they’re supposed to act.”

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