Is Your Emotional Intelligence Authentic, or Self-Serving?

Harvard Business Review

It’s possible to fake emotional intelligence. Similar to knockoffs of luxury watches or handbags, there are emotions and actions that look like the real thing but really aren’t. With the best of intentions, I’ve seen smart leaders charge into sensitive interactions armed with what they believed was a combination of deep empathy, attuned listening, and self-awareness but was, in fact, a way to serve their own emotional needs. Emotional Intelligence.

Can You Predict How Effective You Will Be Today?

Lead Change Blog

My negative emotions drove me to try controlling everyone, and I saw insubordination in anyone who resisted. Good training helps managers understand themselves and manage their own emotional states. It’s a pretty simple list of feelings, moods, and emotions, arranged in a column.

What Great Leaders Know That Good Leaders Don’t about Self-Regulation

General Leadership

The Silent Power Behind Emotional Intelligence. “The emotional brain responds to an event more quickly than the thinking brain.” Our total Emotional Quotient in this model consists of five category areas divided into two dimensions.

Is Cooperation The New Efficiency?

Lead Change Blog

I depended on the operators in our computer facility to do what I needed, when I asked them to. The more I understood their jobs, their routines, and their responsibilities, the more likely I would make intelligent requests of them.

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How to Help Someone Develop Emotional Intelligence

Harvard Business Review

Sadly, far too many people at work lack basic emotional intelligence. It takes a lot of effort to change long-standing habits of human interaction — not to mention foundational competencies like self-awareness and emotional self-control. Emotional Intelligence.

Reality Checks Leaders Must Give Themselves in 2016 (Part One)

Lead Change Blog

On top of hard managerial, left-brain skills that drive bottom-line results, they have uncanny intuition and perception to understand the emotional realities of the circumstances and people around them. Leadership is not for the faint of heart. It never has been.

Reality Checks Leaders Must Give Themselves in 2016 (Part Two)

Lead Change Blog

On top of hard managerial, left-brain skills that drive bottom-line results, they have uncanny intuition and perception to understand the emotional realities of the circumstances and people around them. This helps to filter any criticism, strain out emotion and find the facts.

How Leaders Can Develop Their Skills With One Simple Habit

Tanveer Naseer

For most of us, our default mode of operating in the world is to be caught up in our thinking. Perhaps most important for leadership development, we can systematically train to improve both business acumen and emotional intelligence.

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Emotional Intelligence Has 12 Elements. Which Do You Need to Work On?

Harvard Business Review

Her manager feels lucky to have such an easy direct report to work with and often compliments Esther on her high levels of emotional intelligence, or EI. So much for emotional intelligence , she’s starting to think. The trap that has ensnared Esther and her manager is a common one: They are defining emotional intelligence much too narrowly. Having expert support during your ups and downs as you practice operating in a new way is invaluable.

Leadership Essentials for the Matrix Environment

Great Leadership By Dan

Similarly, in today’s business climate, economic asteroid hits are becoming more frequent, forcing organizations to embrace matrix operating models that enable vital adaptability, flexibility and the capacity to rapidly assimilate new ideas.

Leadership Lessons from the World’s Most Admired Companies

Great Leadership By Dan

Leadership is the "glue" that connects the WMACs' business strategy, operations and program changes, and ultimately, their commitment to human capital. Second, the WMACs believe "social and emotional" skill development is twice as important as "technical" skill development.

Are We Setting Our Leaders Up For Success?


You wanted to be the best operator so didn’t ask many questions – after all, asking questions shows that you were not ready for the promotion in the first place, doesn’t it? Knowing when to step back into your comfort zone is also a skill linked to self-awareness and emotional intelligence.

My Top 10 Leadership Insights For 2015

Tanveer Naseer

And this is understandable if we appreciate that – thanks to the faster-pace by which we now have to operate – it’s become harder for people to make those connections for themselves.”

Can Every Conflict Be Resolved?

The Recovering Engineer

The operating definition that I work from for a successful conflict resolution is that the involved parties have come to an agreement about their future behaviors and interactions with regard to each other that ends, or resolves, the conflict. The cost of the agreement can be measured in terms of the financial, emotional, or physical effort implications of accepting the changed behavior. I often get asked if every conflict can be resolved.

Building Awareness ~ Lessons from a Dancing Bear

You're Not the Boss of Me

While operating from intuition alone can be a dangerous thing, there are times when those gut feelings serve a very useful purpose.

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Flexibility: Stretching Traditional Notions of Work

Lead Change Blog

Fritz Associate Curator at Matthew T Fritz is a leader and mentor in the field of complex organizational change, emotional intelligence, and organization strategy.

Is Your Culture Anchored in Strengths or Weaknesses?

The Practical Leader

Research ranging from engagement surveys, customer satisfaction, team effectiveness, Emotional Intelligence, to Positive Psychology proves it. Most organizations we’re working with today have declared a set of values.

Developing The CEO Within You.

Rich Gee Group

Based upon many hours of advisory with C-Level clients, here are the two major tenets that bubble to the top: IQ – Intelligence Quotient (or Tactical Intelligence). Operational – Know how the organization works inside and out. EQ – Emotional Quotient (or Emotional Intelligence).

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Failed Culture Change Causes Failed IT Projects

The Practical Leader

This leads to sizeable cost overruns, missed deadlines, disrupted operations, unhappy customers, and stressed out employees. Many organizations are implementing significant overhauls of their IT systems. But many of these projects are poorly implemented.

Will Artificial Intelligence Take Your Job?

Leading Blog

The term artificial intelligence first appeared in an article by Stanford professor John McCarthy in 1979. Ever since, artificial intelligence or cognitive technologies as it is often referred to, have been slowly developing in capability and application.

Review of “How to Be Exceptional: Drive Leadership Success by Magnifying Your Strengths”

The Practical Leader

We’re also at the intersection of powerful and revolutionary research emerging from the new movements of Emotional Intelligence, Positive Psychology, Appreciative Inquiry, and Strengths. How to Be Exceptional couldn’t come at a better time.

Leading Beyond

Coaching Tip

In LEADING BEYOND THE EGO by John Knights, Danielle Grant, and Greg Young show how intellectual, emotional, and spiritual intelligence can be combined to create "transpersonal leadership." Transpersonal leaders operate beyond their egos. They are radical, ethical, and authentic, while emotionally intelligent and caring. . "To Transpersonal leaders are able to: Embed authentic, ethical, and emotionally intelligent behaviors into the DNA of the organization.

Why Leaders Don’t Embrace the Skills They’ll Need for the Future

Harvard Business Review

Emotionally, it usually takes the form of fear. This same phenomenon operates not just individually, but also organizationally. This requires understanding and exploring the complex factors, both cognitive and emotional, that drive their behavior. amriphoto/Getty Images.

Review of “How to Be Exceptional: Drive Leadership Success by Magnifying Your Strengths”

The Practical Leader

We’re also at the intersection of powerful and revolutionary research emerging from the new movements of Emotional Intelligence, Positive Psychology, Appreciative Inquiry, and Strengths. How to Be Exceptional couldn’t come at a better time. We’re standing at a very critical crossroad. Our organizations desperately want and need much stronger leadership at all levels. But a torrent of studies show most leadership development approaches aren’t working.

Working with People Who Aren’t Self-Aware

Harvard Business Review

At the office, we don’t have to look far to find unaware colleagues — people who, despite past successes, solid qualifications, or irrefutable intelligence, display a complete lack of insight into how they are coming across. Sven Krobot/EyeEm/Getty Images.

The First Step in Self-Awareness Isn’t You

Leading Blog

The self absorbed leader struggles with self-awareness and emotional intelligence because self-awareness is about how we are perceived by others. An inward focus dooms us to operate from a place of weakness—never able to see what is holding us back. Of Related Interest: 12 Keys to Greater Self-Awareness Emotional Intelligence: Self-Awareness. Ironically, the more self absorbed we are, the less self-aware we are.

What Self-Awareness Really Is (and How to Cultivate It)

Harvard Business Review

In fact, this pattern existed for 19 out of the 20 competencies the researchers measured, including emotional self-awareness, accurate self-assessment, empathy, trustworthiness, and leadership performance. ” We ask this when trying to understand our emotions ( Why do I like employee A so much more than employee B? ), or our behavior ( Why did I fly off the handle with that employee? ), or our attitudes ( Why am I so against this deal? ). Archi Trujillo/Getty Images.

Why Great Success Can Bring Out the Worst Parts of Our Personalities

Harvard Business Review

John Paul Getty installed a coin-operated pay phone in his villa to avoid subsidizing his guests’ phone calls; at the time, he was the richest man in the world. But it does require a minimum of self-awareness, emotional reckoning, and work that likely goes against the grain. But in reality, their resistance to such feedback is subtle but noticeable, fueled as much by personal emotions as by the very real need to project confidence as a leader. ses/Getty Images.

Why do smart people do dumb things?

Coaching Tip

A growing body of evidence shows that the ability to be smarter with ones feelings is tied to improved leadership, effectiveness, relationships, decision-making health and well-being; all of which help higher emotional intelligence (EQ) leaders create greater economic and societal value. “EQ

7 Skills That Aren’t About to Be Automated

Harvard Business Review

” In effective communication, story and fact, rhetoric and science intertwine to enlist the emotions of others to take action on a topic or an initiative. For example, the original Google car found it hard to compute the context within which it was operating. Emotional competence. Yet, as the neuroscientist Antonio Damasio noted in Descarte’s Error , our option set may be shaped by rationality, but it is emotion that binds us to action.

The IFB Leadership Model

Great Leadership By Dan

Trust building requires mastery of integrity, emotional intelligence, and your “we” disposition. Balance Continuously : When transforming your organization into one that operates on the principle of change as a constant, integral part of doing business, balancing activities must be ongoing. She is also a Preferred Partner at Six Seconds , the largest emotional intelligence network in the world.

Being a Good Boss in Dark Times

Harvard Business Review

Mass shootings, suicide bombers, assassinations — the emotions such events bring up are strong, even if our personal connection to the events themselves is not. Bring your emotions to work. Some people believe that emotions should be left at home.

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The Mental Benefits of Vacationing Somewhere New

Harvard Business Review

The result is personal growth — greater emotional agility, empathy, and creativity. The first benefit is enhanced emotional agility , or the ability to not react immediately to emotions, but to observe those that arise, carefully collect information to understand the possible causes, then intentionally decide how to manage them. I now know that any initial anxiety is just a reaction, one that will dissipate as I begin to operate in it. joshua sortino/Unsplash.

How to Develop Empathy for Someone Who Annoys You

Harvard Business Review

Next, “lean in to your emotional self-control and willpower,” McKee says. There are two types of empathy : cognitive empathy , the ability to understand another person’s perspective, and emotional empathy , the ability to feel what someone else feels. ” To muster emotional empathy for that colleague, “find something in them to care about,” McKee says. ” Emotional intelligence Collaboration Conflict Digital Article

How to Work with People Who Aren’t Good at Working with People

Harvard Business Review

But research suggests that people with low EQ, as emotional intelligence is often called, may not realize what important skills they lack. They are often fighting inner demons and riddled with existential angst – the academic euphemism for this is emotional labor.

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What You Can Do to Improve Ethics at Your Company

Harvard Business Review

Most leaders in the study reflected on how rapidly their businesses had globalized over the last 10 years and how ethical issues can be profoundly difficult when operating across different cultures. Emotional intelligence can help you here. You also need emotional self-control: it takes courage to step away from the crowd and do the right thing. Ethics Emotional intelligence Digital ArticleEnron. Wells Fargo. Volkswagen.

Being a Parent Made Me a Better Manager, and Vice Versa

Harvard Business Review

For positive spillovers between parenting and work to happen, we must reflect on how we operate and who we are in each domain. Leadership Managing people Emotional intelligence Digital Article

To Make a Team More Effective, Find Their Commonalities

Harvard Business Review

Research from Google’s people operations department — its term for human resources — confirms the importance of these two qualities. Emotional Intelligence. 3 Ways to Better Understand Your Emotions. Leading teams Emotional intelligence Collaboration Digital ArticleTeams, not individuals, are the future of work.

See Colleagues as They Are, Not as They Were

Harvard Business Review

But an understanding of mindfulness – how it really operates in the context of daily work activities – is essential to good working relationships; relationships that let both us and our coworkers grow and change over time. Psychology Emotional intelligence Article

The Top Complaints from Employees About Their Leaders

Harvard Business Review

In the survey, employees called out the kind of management offenses that point to a striking lack of emotional intelligence among business leaders, including micromanaging, bullying, narcissism, indecisiveness, and more. Leadership Emotional intelligence Communication

Get in the Right State of Mind for Any Negotiation

Harvard Business Review

” Sometimes emotional flare-ups threated their collaboration. He claimed that the new platform blatantly copied Apple’s graphic operating system (even though Apple had itself liberally borrowed programming developed earlier at Xerox, PARC). I’m kind of less emotional.”

Defusing an Emotionally Charged Conversation with a Colleague

Harvard Business Review

But if you’re like most people, every now and then you find yourself immersed in a conversation so emotionally charged it seems to have nothing to do with the issues you’re supposedly discussing. Difficult conversations Conflict Emotional intelligence Article

Your Employees’ Emotions Are Clues to What Motivates Them

Harvard Business Review

One goal of developing emotional intelligence is to better understand the people around you. Emotions can reveal information that people can’t directly tell you, because they arise from the operation of the motivational system. Emotional intelligence Psychology